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— This is a transcribed copy of Bad Hair Day. —
Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
Previous: "Amulet of Enfarg" Next: "Monster Blues"

Scientist: And now for the final test. Let there be hair.

[???]

Scientist: Yes! Yes! I am a genius.

[???]

Scintist: I'm... still bald. Bald! Bald! Bald, bald, bald, bald I'm bald, bald, bald! I'm a failure! I'm a failure! I'm a joke! And I'm bald!

[???]

Ickis: Oh, this is great.

Krumm: Do you think they'll fall for it?

Ickis: Does a monster eat slime worms? Shh! Here they come.

[???]

Urbab: This is where Ickis said to meet him. He said it was important.

Kriggle: Oh, okay.

Urbab: Ickis? Are you in there?

(Hysterical laughing)

Together: Monster mischief day!

( Both laughing )

Ickis: Look at you two!

Kriggle: That's not funny, ickis.

Ickis: Oh, yeah? Then why are they laughing?

[Monsters laughing.]

Urbab: We're going to get you back, Ickis and Krumm. Oh, yes, we will.

Ickis: (Sarcastically): Ooh. I'm so scared. I wouldn't want to be haunted by the great big (Clucking) Chickens! (Giggling)

Oblina: That was not funny, ickis. That was cruel.

Ickis: Ah, come on. It's monster mischief day. Krumm, let's do another one.

Krumm: No, I don't think so. Maybe Oblina's right.

Ickis: Oh, fine. Suit yourself.

[???]

Gromble: Enough! I like monster mischief day As much as the next monster. But when a prank results in leaving Krumm without the benefit of his... Pit hairs I just have to put my Pump down. Just look at him. His hair, His precious pit hair is gone. And it will take years For him to grow it back. Poor, pitiful Krumm. These pranks must stop now. There is no room in this class for such childishness!

Oblina: Poor Krummy. Your hair, the very thing that makes you you is gone.

Ickis: Go ahead, Oblina. Make me feel even worse about this, why don't you? Krumm, I'm so sorry! It's all my fault for letting those pranks get out of control! Krumm... I am going to get your hair back, even if it kills me.

Oblina: If it kills you?

Ickis: Well, or hurts me a little. Come on! Are you with me?!

Krumm: Well...

Oblina: Well, of course we are. But where are we going to get hair?

Ickis: Easy. Humans throw it away All the time.

[???]

Ickis: Come on, we can't give up yet.

Oblina: Ickis, we have tried every place having to do with hair And we found nothing.

Krumm: Guys, I appreciate you pulling off All those scares for me But I think I'd be better off Letting my hair grow back naturally. 17 Years isn't that long. I'm going to bed.

Oblina: You poor thing. Good night, Ickis.

Ickis: 17 Years. I cannot take all this guilt for 17 years. I got to find hair. What am I thinking about? You just can't find hair!

[???]

Ickis: Yes! Yes! Thank you, thank you.

[??]

Ickis: Oh, so do you like it, huh? Isn't it great?

Krumm: Great? It's... How did... What did?

Ickis: I said I would get you hair, didn't i?

Oblina: You did this?

Ickis: That's right. I restored krumm's hair. All by myself. Or not.

Oblina: "Hair tonic." And where did you get this?

Ickis: In the dump. Isn't it great?

Krumm: This is terrible.

Ickis: Well, I admit it doesn't have The disgusting texture of your old hair, all right. But with a little axle grease...

Krumm: No, you don't understand. The hair of a krumm is not to be tampered with By artificial means. That's the rule of the krumms.

Ickis: Well! Do the krumms have a rule About gratitude?! I thought you might thank me For giving you your hair back! But nooooo. "The hair of a krumm Is not to be tampered with." Well, guess what, krumm?! I tampered with it. And it looks fine!

Krumm: This doesn't look so good, ickis.

Ickis: Well, the dump wasn't built in a day. Give me some time! There. Perfect

Oblina: Ickis, How much of this stuff Did you put on krumm's pits?

Ickis: Uh, eleven.

Oblina: Drops?

Ickis: Bottles. Why, is that, is that Is that, is that, is that bad?

Oblina: Well, you tell me.

(Krum's hair started to grow.]

Oblina: Well, and what do you plan To do about this, ickis?

Ickis: We simply cut it. There is no reason to panic.

Krumm: Do you think we should panic now?

Ickis: Yeah. We should definitely panic...

[Thousands of hair landed on the the monsters.]

Ickis: Ah!

Oblina: Ickis, get ahold of yourself. I have a plan. It is called plan "a." All we have to do is keep krumm hidden here And find a way to stop his hair from growing Before the gromble finds out. Right, krumm?

Krumm: I'm over here.

(???)

Krumm: sorry about that.

Ickis: May I suggest we go to plan "b"?

Oblina: There is no plan "b."

Ickis: I'm going back to panicking now If you don't mind.

[???]

Ickis: Next time, have a plan "b."

Oblina: Next time, do not tamper with the hair of a krumm. Krumm. What are you doing here? We told you to stay in the room.

Ickis: Yeah, krumm. What if the gromble Finds out?

Gromble: Finds out what, ickis?

Ickis: ( Squeals ) Got to run.

Gromble: Not so fast, young monsters. Perhaps you'd... Ooh, hoo-hoo! Be so kind as to let... Ooh, hoo-ha. ...me in on... Ooh! ( Laughs )

Ickis: Oh, I'm glad to see You keep a sense of humor About this, your grombleness.

Gromble: There is nothing funny going... (Laughing) I'm giving you Three seconds to tell me Who is responsible for all this.

Krumm: I am.

Gromble: Krumm? Is that you?

Krumm: Yes, sir. And it's all my fault. I let ickis and oblina convince me That my hair was the thing that made me me. I shouldn't have let them get me all worked up over it.

Gromble: Krumm.

Krumm: Um... Over here.

Gromle: Oops. Yes. It's not what's on the outside that makes you you. It's what's inside you.

Krumm: You mean... My soul?

Gromble: No! (Laughs) Your stink glands! That's what makes a Krumm a Krumm.

Krumm: Wow. I never thought of it that way.

Gromble: Oh, how touching. Now would someone mind doing something about all this hair!

Krumm: I'll handle this! With what makes me... Me. Stand aside, everybody. First class Krumm stinkcloud on the way!

(???)

Krumm: I've been working up that one for a while.

Gromble: Good work, Krumm.

Ickis: I'm sorry, Krumm.

Oblina: Me, too. We shall never overlook your stinkiness again.

Ickis: Well, that's that. I'll just be going back to the old room now.

(Gromble clears his throat)

Gromble: Uh-uh. Mustn't dilly-dally. You've got a lot more work ahead of you.

Ickis: I hate hair. I hate hair! I hate hair. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it. Bald! The world should be bald.

Scientist: bald, bald, bald, bald, bald! Bald! Bald, bald, bald, bald, bald. I'm... Still bald.

[???]

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