Aaahh!!! Real Monsters Wiki

[episode starts.]

Ickis: I love styrofoam, It's so versatile. Krumm, don't my decorations.

Krumm: Calm down.

Ickis: I cannot calm down, My father is coming. Everything has to Be just disgusting.

Krumm: He won't care. Mine wouldn't

Oblina: Why would he? Your father Is a mold farmer.

Krumm: Yup. He's the best mold farmer in the whole dump.

Ickis: Oh, I wish my father Were a mold farmer. But no I had to be the Son of the great slickis, The most ghastly graduate This school ever had. Try living Up to that!

Krumm: Who says you have to? Ickis: Nobody. Certainly not me. We're all different, right, I mean, he's this great hero Like his dad and his dad before Him, and I'm just me.

Oblina: Did you know Ickis's father can read 28 languages?

Krumm: Now that's talent.

Oblina: And he virtually invented The deep-wailing screech!

Krumm: You know more about this father than he does.

Oblina: It must be so inspiring. Have a father who is a vim! Very important monster.

Ickis: I wish he was more father And less important.

Gromble: As you all know, the trick In coming from under the bed Is timing and, of course, that Pesky element of surprise.

Ickis: That's my dad. Always making an entrance.

Gromble: Slickis. Brilliant! Simply brilliant! I saw it coming, Of course. But still it Was masterful.

Slickis: Ickis, my boy.

Gromble: Slickis, my friend an agonizing pleasure as always. How long has it Been 3-400 years?

Slickis: Can't be.

Gromble: I adored The entrance. Reminded me of that Little number you did On your Graduation night.

Slickis: Oh, yeah, that was A good one, wasn't it?

Gromble: Yes, we'd love to see it, If you don't mind.

[all cheer]

Gromble: We're here At the 14th. A tough par two through The clown's mouth. Here's dad-- He's sh**ting six over After taking a penalty On the windmill. That's what I call A scare par excellence.

Slickis: Yeah, ever since then they've Called it the bermuda triangle.

All: Ooh.

Oblina: Amazing! you scared an entire Geographical location.

Slickis: Well it was mostly water.

Ickis: Please, do not let me Take you away from This installment of tales Of the great slickis.

Oblina: Why did you walk out?

Ickis: Why did I look out? Look at him! Going on and on. Who cares about The bermuda Triangle anyway? You can't even see it.

Slickis: Hey, son, what do you say we Go some place for a slime pie.

Ickis: Really?

Slickis: Really.

Ickis: Sure.

Slickis: Great. Hey, you guys wanna come? While we're at it, Hey, everybody, Slime pies on me.

All: Yeah!

Krumm: Hurry up, Ickis. Slime pies.

Ickis: Go ahead. I'm gonna stay here.

Oblina: Why?

Ickis: I'm not just in the mood.

Oblina: So your father won a few Ribbons and trophies And plaques and trophies And more trophies and--

Ickis: Alright already! So what if he's better At everything! You think I care?

Oblina: Stop acting like a spoiled monster.

Ickis: It's not my fault. You see what Happens. There's always A crowd. Why can't it ever just Be my dad and me.

Oblina: I don't know. but You are certainly Not going to find Out by avoiding him. You're not even Giving him a chance.


Slickis: Ickis, over here!

Spikeball: Yo, sparky, Meter's running. Take your best shot Or step aside.

Krumm: Okie dokie.

Spikeball: Touch split.

Slickis: How 'bout you, son? Don't you like This game?

Ickis: Like it? I live for it. [Giggles] I was born with a Gorblat in my mouth. Yoo-hoo, wow, oh, dad, Look, I did it! I did it, I did it!


Gromble: Oh, it is so good to see You back on the lanes. How about showing us some Of your famous moves.

Slickis: Aw, come on, man, Give me a break.

Gromble: Please, for the Old alma mater? If you don't mind, The whirling Double-back Cross-cross.

Slickis: Well if you insist.


Slickis: So we got the whole Night ahead of us, What should we do?

Ickis: I don't know.

Slickis : We could gorblat Some more. Sharpen up your game.

Ickis: Thanks, I've had enough Gorblats for one day.

Slickis: We could go up Top and forage.

Ickis: I'm not hungry.

Slickis: Okay well we can just sit here and talk.

Ickis: Let's go scaring.

Slickis: What?

Ickis: Let's go scaring. I could show you What I learned.

Slicks: Great Idea boy. Who should we scare?

[Cuts to the outside.]

Slickis: Shall we? Come on, son, think Of the possibilities. Dirt flying Everywhere. Humans screaming and one Really confused houseplant.

Ickis: Too easy.

Slickis: Wow it must be wild out there. We could do some realDamage here, son. Two for the Price of one.

Ickis: You should get out more.

Slickis: This is more Like it. You know, if we hurry, We can still Catch that Baby shower.

Ickis: Hey listen I want a challenge. If you're not up to it, I'll do it alone.

Slickis: No, no, no, no, We're gonna do this Together, just Like we planned.

Ickis: I know what I am doing.

Slickis: I'm sure you do, I just wanna Make sure that you can--

Ickis: I do not need your advice, I can handle it.

General: Move it out! You got lead in Your delicates?

Ickis: Now that's a scare.

Slickis: No way!

Ickis: Yes way!

Slickis: You can't scare that guy. He's completely protected By that-that-- that thing.

Ickis: You think I'm gonna Chicken out Just because It's solid steel, Weighs five tons And has really, Really big wheels, ha! Kiss my ears!

[Ickis runs after them.]

Slickis: Ickis! Come back!

Troop: I can't see a thing though this.

Men: Are we there yet?

General: Not yet!

Slickis: There's a whole Battalion over there, Why don't we just--

Ickis: Dad I can handle this. This is my scare. Out of the way. Prepared to be petrified. Prepared to be paralyzed. Prepare to- AAHH! DAD!

Men: Are we there yet?

General: Do I have to say that again? Not yet!

Ickis: Get used to it, I'm a failure. I'm never gonna be The monster you are.

Slickis: Come on son.

Gromble: Good afternoon, My petite pusmongers. We have a rare Treat in store. It has come to my attention That slickis and his son Have gone on A scare together. I'm sure they would Be delighted To share this with us. Um Let's give them a little Encouragement, shall we?

Krumm: What are we doing here?

Ickis: Just waiting to be humiliated.

Gromble: Ickis?

Ickis: What is it, sir? Um I-- i-- I'll I don't Wanna hog everyone's time.

Gromble: Very well then. Slickis, would you Be so kind?


Gromble: Whoa, yes, uh, Well ahem. This is most unusual. I think under the Circumstances, we should-- Yes, and moving Right along

Ickis: I cannot believe that was you, you stunk.

Slickis: Well, everybody's gotta Start somewhere.

Ickis: Yeah, but you're The great slickis. I never thought Of you As a nerdy little piece

Of monster fluff like me.

Slickis: That's the point. I didn't start Out this good. It takes time.

Ickis: I'll say.

Slickis: You gotta have faith In yourself, kid. You know, you got All the makings Of a truly loathsome Monstrosity like me

Ickis: You think so dad?

Slickis: Absolutely. You know, you got more Than my big ears, kid. Hey, did I ever Tell you About the time I tried To scare a faucet?

Ickis: No wait.

Slickis: Yes way! I'm climbing up Through the pipes. Through the hair, Through the toothpaste. Through the mucus. All the spit