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— This is a transcribed copy of Internal Affairs. —
Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
Previous: "Showdown" Next: "Laugh Krumm Laugh"

[episode starts]

Sal: Hmm, medium-size, meaty likes gaage-- A definite possibility. [ Shivers] much too skinny. What a nightmare! Now, that's what I call a veritable palace For a parasite. Home on the hoof, three squares a day And room to expand. Dream house, here I come!

Both: Hey that's mine!

Sal: No! yes yes no yes?

Oblina: Oh for petey's sake. I can see there's only one way to settle this. I shall eat it.

[???]

Sal: Look at this. She's a stick. I could have had the big one. Oh, well, I'm going to make this place bigger, eh? Now, one of these has got to be hunger. But which one?

[Sal begins to pull the vines. From outside her body, Oblina groaned in pain.]

Krumm: Oblina, are you alright?

Oblina: I'm fine, I am just... Hungry!

Sal: They call that music?

[Sal hangs a poster of a cartoon caricature of Elvis Presley.]

Sal: It ain't art, but it's a start.

Ickis: Sir, we have a little problem we like to discuss with you.

Gromble: This better be a huge problem, Ickis!

[KERBAM! Ickis and Krumm got crashed though just as an obese Oblina appeared.}

Gromble: Sluggy buggy!

Oblina: I have not see why everyone is so upset. Oh, I'm just perfectly fine.

[Later]

Monster Doctor: Let's see what we have here.

[???]

Monster Doctor: This is bad. Very very bad. I ran up against this character before. He's a parasite monster. He lives inside other monsters making them hungry. His name is Sal. There's nothing we can do, either he'll get bored and leave or she'll eat until she bursts

All: Bursts?

Mosnter Doctor: Like a boil.

Oblina: This is absolutely ridiculous. There is an easy way to fix this, I will simply pull my guts out of my mouth and [pulls guts] Volah!

[Oblina tries to pull her guts out but it's too fat.]

Oblina: No! No! no! My guts are too big. I cannot pull them out. If I cannot pull out my guts, I cannot scare. JUST GIVE IT TO ME STRAIGHT, DOC! Have you got anything to eat? [slurp] better.

Ickis: There must be some way to get rid of Sal. Why, if Krumm and I we're small enough, we'd go right in there and we would make him come out!

[Ickis laughs]

Ickis: We would send him packing! Too bad there's no way to make us small like that

[Later]

Ickis: Oh no.

Krumm: Thanks a lot, buddy.

Dr. Buzz Kut: Nothing to worry about. The shinknmaster 8000 is a find machine.

Gromble: Why the shrinkmaster 8000, dr. Buzz kutt?

Dr. Buzz Kut: The other 7999 didn't work.

[??]

Gromble: There's a map in the boat. You only need to get to her stomach and back. I have complete confidence that you will be successful. Good luck. And don't screw it up!

[???]

Ickis: That must be the ptoritari gland.

Krumm: Which way, Ickis?

Ickis: Go left!

Krumm: Left?

Ickis: Right!

Krumm: Okay!

[???]

Krumm: Where do you think we are?

Ickis: I think's her scaritory glands, Don't touch anything! One false move and...

[???]

Ickis: I hate my life.

Oblina: What's happening? I feel funny.

Dr. Buzz Kut: They're out of control. They're in her lungs. They're doomed. Doomed, I tell you. There's nothing we can do.

Gromble: No, they're not! Quick, Oblina. Hold your breath! No! They can climb out. I just hope they don't slip. One false move and they'll activate her horendix!

Krumm: Don't let me go! Don't let me go!

Ickis: Will you stop wiggling? I can't hold you!

[???]

Dr. Buzz Kut: Incoming. Take cover!

[???]

Gromble: STOP! Ickis, Krumm, you get back down here and find that parasite!

[???]

Krumm: Hey, this stuff tingles.

Ickis: It's digestive acid. We made it we're in her stomach.

Krumm: Acid? We better get out of here before we get digested too!

[The two monsters run out of the acid and shaking them off.]

Sal: Hey, hey, hey, was you raised in a barn? I want you off of that rug, that is genuine banana skin. Hey, what are you doing here, anyway, huh? This is my gig, scram!

Krumm: This isn't a gig. This is our friend, Oblina.

Ickis: Yeah, and It's time for you to move out, buster!

[???]

Ickis: No were to run no were to hide!

Sal: That's what you think, wise guy. I'll bury youse alive! Eat, monster! Eat!

Oblina: I need garbage!

Gromble: Oblina no!

[Oblina eats the monster scope]

Ickis: Alright ,that is it! I have had enough! I have been shrunk. I have been eaten. I have been SHOOP DA LOOP through places no monster should ever see. I REFUSE to be digested! Sal the parasite, you have met you're match.

[He leaps onto the vines.]

Krumm: Ickis, wait!

[???]

Monster Doctor: She's gonna explode.

Krumm: Ickis, I don't think is helping!

Ickis: You got a better idea?

[???]

Sal: You'll never get me out. Wait, stop! Don't pull the the blue one.

Ickis: The blue one? [giggles] You don't want me to pull the blue one?

Sal: Wait wait wait wait wait...We can talk about this.

Ickis: I'M THROUGH TALKING!

[Ickis pulls the blue string and everything comes out of her stomach. Splash! Ickis and Krumm flew right into the machine and changed back to normal size.]

Ickis: Oblina?

[???]

Gromble: Sluggy Buggy!

Oblina: Oh Icky. Oh Krummy oh. How can I ever thank you?

Krumm: It was nothing.

Ickis: Nothing? Do have any idea- what we-? Oblina, it was...We almost got...

Krumm: Ickis.

Ickis: [sigh] You're welcome.

Sal: Look what you did, ya homewreckers!

[Oblina grabs Sal.]

Oblina: Not so fast. Buster.

Sal: So you got me who cares? You can't do anything to me because I'm not one of your students.

Gromble: No, but you've been toying with my students. And that deserves a special kind of punishment, don't you?

[The Gromble chortled menacingly as he stared towards the ballerina glass. Sal gulped.]

[In the next scene, Sal spins round inside the ballerina glass as his punishment with the music playing.]

Gromble: So dance! Dance! BOOGIE WOOGIE WOOGIE UNTIL YOU CAN'T BOOGIE NO MORE!

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