Aaahh!!! Real Monsters Wiki
Advertisement
— This is a transcribed copy of Old Monster. —
Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
Previous: "Gone Shopp'n" Next: "Mother, May I"

[The cameras pans away from the city to the city dump and then to the Gromble's auditorium, a belcher monster belches to signify the start of class.]

Gromble: [Carrying a chair where the top part is made of bones] Greetings, tiny terals. [Smeech gives the Gromble an eaten apple with worms in it.] Thank you, Smeech. This sort of thing goes a long way with me. [The Gromble then eats the apple] Now you're all in for a treat, please give a warm welcome to a monster who needs no introduction.

Ickis: [Whispers] Betcha two rats he gives him one.

Gromble: A monster who scared more humans than me. The Shroink.

[There is no reply from The Shroink]

Gromble: The Shroink. [Still no answer] THE SHROINK!

[The Shroink then appears]

Krumm: That's the Shroink?

Gromble: You're about to hear some great moments in history class, listen and learn. [The Gromble goes through a door]

Shroink: So what do you wanna hear? You wanna hear about scaring Have I told you the one about the crack?

Monster: How could we have we never even seen this guy before.

Shroink: Let me tell you about my best scare. It was nighttime .No, It was dusk. Maybe it was morning. [The chair then breaks as he sits on it and all the monsters laugh.]

Monster: Get to the scary part.

Shroink: I had just finished snacking on a nice leather steering wheel-

[He falls asleep. And after that little moment, they all laugh.]

Krumm: Come on. And now, It is my sencere previlage to present the Shroink. [The monsters impersonate The Shroink, Ickis acts old and holding Oblina like a walking stick.]

[everyone laughs, as The Gromble bursts through the door.]

Gromble: Ickis! Krumm! Oblina! Shroink and I have discuss your behavior. And we decided there's only one thing to do, you should escort Shroink back to his dump, have a good time.

[The monsters are escorting Shroink from an alley way]

Oblina: Come on come on.

[The monsters then jump onto the back of a bus]

Shroink: Hold on just a minute. I'm coming. Wait a second. Don't worry. I know a little short cut.

Ickis: Could he possibly move any slower?

[???]

Shroink: Well looky here. If it isn't old George Washington.

Ickis: He looks familiar.

Shroink: Terrible picture. He looks more better than person.

Oblina: You knew this human.

Shroink: Knew him? I scared him. I was just a young slip of a monster when I first saw George. It was somewhere near the Delaware river.

Man: General Washington, Sir, shouldn't we go now?

George: It looks a little choppy. Maybe we shouldn't do this.

Man: But, sir, The element of surprise-

George: I say we wait.

George: Go go go!

Ickis: Either I've been Here in a past life Or we've been down this street three times already.

Shroink: Trust me. There's a little short cut right over there.

[???]

Ickis: Shroink!

Oblina: Use me.

Krumm: Come here dog!

Shroink: Did someone mention shortcut?

Krumm: No.

[???]

Krumm: I love littererss.

Shroink: Reminds me of a guy I once scared. His name was Albert Einstein.

Einstein: E equals mc plus two. No, that's not right. E equals mc Times two. No, no, that is Not right, either.

Ickis: His hair stayed that way forever?

Shroink: Absolutely. Once you been shroinked. Come on kids, let's take the shortcut.

[???]

Oblina: Not again.

Krumm: I guess we better save him.

Boy: Here I'm here!

Boy: Run away!

Shroink: This way is a shortcut.

Ickis: I think we all had enough with you're shortcuts. This time we are going our way, if you don't mind.

Shroink: I wouldn't go in there if I were you.

[???]

Monster: Litch is going to love this.

Ickis: I'm guessing that's Lech.

Lech: So, what do we have here? Three Academy wimps And a shriveled Old geezer.

Shroink: I told you we shouldn't have some here. If you only....

Oblina: Allow me.

Oblina: I believe they're laughing.

Shroink : I've had jus About enough Of you punks.

Lech: What are you gonna do? Wheexe on me?

[???]

Shroink: Don't worry kids. I'll have us out of here before you can say Gophoo.

Krumm: I can't watch.

[???}

Krumm: Wow.

Oblnia: Stupendus really. I have never seen anything like this.

Ickis: You were great.

Shroink: That was nothing. Did I ever tell about the time-

[Back home.]

Shroink: What I'm saying is You have to believe In your own burps.

Ickis: I'll never be able to do that.

Shroink: Sure you will, Ickis. You know what the secret is To being a great monster?

Oblina: I know Being the scariest

Krumm: Being the smellest.

Ickis: Be related to the Gromble?

Shroink: Well now, speaking of the Gromble, I once had a student who thought he never make it.

Woman: Do you think these Make my feet look big?

Man: Bring me those slingbacks in a seven. Step on it.

Ickis: Think how different The gromble would be If he wore sneakers.

Shroink: Why do you think he's cranky all the time? His toes are pinched.

Ickis: I'm gonna miss you Shroink.

Krumm: Me too.

Oblina: So am I.

Ickis: Tell us another story.

Shroink: Did I tell you About taking the gromble To the shoe store?

Gromble: Alright. Time to go, story time is over.

Ickis: What are you doing here?

Gromble: Making sure The shroink got home. The shroink needs his res And we should be heading back. I trust shroink didn't Give you too much trouble.

Krumm: He's one cool monster.

Oblina: He's one cool monster. And he told us The most marvelous stories.

Gromble: Those were the same stories he used to tell me.

Oblina: And are they all true?

Gromble: Of course they are. Great monsters Like shroink never fib.

Ickis: Even the one about the shoe store?

Gromble: Nonono! Absolutely not! Absolute, positive drivel! That ridiculous nonsense!

Ickis: But you just said- [The Gromble glares at him for a moment.] Alright.

Gromble: Maybe I should have Grabbed the black ones.

[???]

Advertisement