The Aaahh!!! Real Monsters Wiki

[The episode starts.]

Don: I like rice.

Host: We're back and were talking to scared with three victims of monster sightings.

Simon: Do I look scared? Am I whimpering? I'm a monster hunter okay? I hang out in the sewers, and find and hunt monsters. It's a dirty job. Someone's gotta do it.

Don: I like rice.

Host: Yeah. So how many of you caught?

Simon: Well, it depends on how you to find. And why do I hunt monster?

Don: I like rice.

Simon: Rice. Loving lunatics.

Host: So I understand you were scared by monsters who came under the beds.

Bradley: I wasn't scared and there's only one.

Host: How about you, Murray?

Murray: I saw three. Uh huh. Uh huh.

Guy: Yeah, well I saw four. The elves brought them.

Bradley: They think we're all crazy.

Simon: Go ahead and laugh. Very funny. a bunch of clowns we have here.

Host: Color me crazy sounds like a challenge.

Man: What are you doing?

Host: Yes.

Man: That's my car.

Host: It's got all the features you ever want.

Man: You can give them my car.


Man: A million dollars on my car?


Simon: Don't let it get to you kid.

Bradley: They think I'm crazy.

Simon: I haven't said it in my whole life.

Bradley: What do you do?

Simon: Me? I just covered my ears.

Bradley: I wasn't scared.

Simon: Of course you weren't.

Bradley: I'm never scared.

Simon: I know that.

Bradley: Even you?

Simon: Me? No. I'm a professional. Not just animate risking his neck for a use car that allows a million.

[All over the town, people set traps in their homes.]



Gromble: How can this, can simply cause THIS?!



Oblina: Are you sure you alright?

Ickis: Fine fine.

Oblina: Well you don't look fine fine.


Ickis: I'm not fine okay?! I'm miserable.


Ickis: Thank you I feel so much better now.








Ickis: Right.


Simon: Tuesday, a hundred hours a night like any other. Garbage filth, vermin gosh all of it. but underneath. Terror. Terror so real you can smell it. Note to myself, never smell terror at a dump What's that?

Ickis: I said I like to be alone.

Krumm: You mean without me?

Ickis: Right.

Simon: Gotcha! You're not a monster.

Woman: You haven't seen them in the morning.

Simon: Well yes. As a matter in fact I am. Wait a minute. What are you doing here?

Woman: Hunting monsters. Isn't it fun.

Simon: You're hunting what?

Man: I got my on that ventory.

Simon: You cannot hunt monsters! You're a family.


Simon: Probably you say?

Boy: Look there's a monster behind the tree.


Simon: What where?

Woman: Good work sweetie.

Simon: You call that a monster? That's nothing but a bunny rabbit.

Ickis: Krumm I thought I told you. AHH! HELP! HELP!

Simon: Yes! You're mine!

Ickis: I'm lost. Lost forever in the black pit of dispair. Alone, forgotten, without hope. And I'm getting nauseous.

Krumm: Don't worry buddy. I almost had it. Oblina!

Ickis: Good thinking.


Simon: Yes! Yes! I did it! I did...It

Bradley: Wow you got a monster?

Simon: Of course. I got a monster. Why? Why may you ask? Because I'm good.

Ickis: He said was going to save me.

Krumm: Don't worry buddy I got it all figured out.

Simon: Yes! I did it! I did it! Two monsters! I'm so bad! I'm worst!

???: Delivery.


???: Delivery.

Simon: Come on in I'll be right there.

Gromble: I said left.



Oblina :Will you keep it down?


Oblina: No no the other way.

Simon: Excuse me for a minute.

Oblina: Ooh the Lump.

Monster: The lump.

Monster 2: The lamp.

Simon: Woo. I'm worst. I'm worst then worse. I'm Simon the terrible.

Oblina: Will you be quiet?! I'm trying to think.

Monster: What are we gonna do?

Monster 2: Let her think.

Monster: I don't think.



Oblina:We are done for.


[Bradley looked and saw that he recognized Ickis back when he had lost his monster manual back in Monsters, Get Real.]

Bradley: He's the one who scared me.

Simon: It's okay. He can't get out.

Bradley: Wait.. You're scared of me?

Ickis: No way, you're the one who's scared.

Bradley: Am not.

Ickis: Are too!

Bradley: Am not, And I wouldn't scare one who hide under my bed either.

Ickis: Were too!

Bradley: Were not.

Ickis: You weren't scared at all?

Bradley: Nope.

Ickis: At least a little bit?

Bradley: That's right.

Ickis: Fine. I have everything I had.

Bradley: You did?

Ickis: Yeah.

Bradley: Maybe I was scared.

Ickis: You were really?

Bradley: A little bit.

Simon: Don't get close to that cage.

Bradley: No way. The scariest thing is when your parents are out, and your babysitter is asleep. And you hear this awful scratching noise at the window, and you know for sure it's the--

Ickis: (excitable) Whirling, gargantuan with seventeen heads!

Bradley: Yeah sure. Or the boogey man.

Ickis: (giggles) He's scary too.

Bradley: Want a cookie?

Ickis: No thanks. Listen Bradley, I want you to pretend something.

Bradley: Okay.

Ickis: Pretend that you were at a dump, and you're gathering grubs then suddenly, a monster hunter sneaks up behind you and throws you into a cage. A-a-and wants to put you on TV.

Bradley: I went on TV. It was awful.

Ickis: I know. Well, if he puts us on TV... well, everyone is gonna know that we exist. And... they'll hunt us down, and well then...

Simon: Bradley, give me and hand with these cages will ya?

Ickis: Then it will be the end of us Bradley. It will be the end of me.

Simon: Come on, I'm already late.

[Bradley grabs the keys and frees all the monsters.]

Simon: Where's.. Where's my monsters?

Bradley: It was - it was so weird! This light blasted out of his eyes and I couldn't move! And then all of a sudden this voice in my head commanded me to open the cages and I couldn't stop.

Simon: They're more devious than I should have known that. When did I know that. Because I'm stupid that's why. I'm not bad. I'm not terrible! I'm stink!

Bradley: Cookie?