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— This is a transcribed copy of The Ickis Box. —
Feel free to edit or add to this page, as long as the information comes directly from the episode.
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[The episode starts at Crazy Jed's Electronics.]

Man: There must be another sale over Lunatic Willy's. That guy's really bonkers.

Man 2: Why don't you go home and get some rest. I'll close up.

Krumm: What a scare. You were great, Ickis.

Ickis: I was, wasn't I? Oh, nights like this make me glad to be a monster.

Oblina: Marvelous. Absolutely marvelous.

Ickis: Bring on more humans. Ooh, I'm not through yet. Wait for me. I'm going to grab one last look around.

Oblina: Do be careful, Ickis. You know how the Gromble frowns on this improvising.

Ickis: Right back.

[Ickis peeks one corner and saw the T.V. First his foot starts tapping, then his body begin to shake. It seems he started to like it already and starts dancing. Oblina and Krumm peeks through the door holes.]

Krumm: What's wrong with him?

Oblina: I have absolutely no idea. Perhaps he's gone completely mad.

[They exit out of the bathroom.]

Ickis: Whoa!

Oblina: Having fun, were you?

Ickis: You will not believe what I saw in there. It was incredible.

Gromble: Quite a successful little mission, my valiant vermin. I only have one teensy, weensy question. What exactly were you doing?

Ickis: I couldn't help it. I was swept away! It was all so magnificent.

Gromble: I see. Can anyone tell me what are the most fiendish devices ever invented by humans?

Zimbo: He says soap.

Gromble: Well done, Snorch. But today I have one more item to add, more diabolical than soap. It's television.

Ickis: But, Your Gromblosity. TV isn't bad.

Gromble: Didn't you see yourself, Ickis? You were tapping your toes.

Ickis: It wasn't...

Gromble: You were snapping your fingers.

Ickis: Okay. But I-

Gromble: You were shaking your groove thing!

Krumm: He's right you were.

Gromble: Ickis, you don't know the danger. What if a human had come along and surprised you?

Ickis: He would have seen his first dancing monster?

Gromble: You would have been history! Listen to me, my little dust mite. TV is mankind's most sinister creation. It can suck the brains right out of your head.

All: Wow, neat.

Gromble: And turn you into one of these. A potato. A smooth, fresh, healthy, good-for-you vegetable.

Female Monsters: Ew!

Ickis: I don't believe it! Not TV, not TV. It cannot be bad, it can't!

[Back at the dorm.]

Oblina: Stop pacing, Ickis, you are making me woozy. Beside, by now I am sure everyone will have forgotten.

Kringle: Shall we dance?

Horrifica: Shall we?

Ickis: I've never two monsters with less rhythm! We'll just see who has the last laugh.

Krumm: What are you gonna do, buddy?

Ickis: I'll show them all. I'll bring them all back to that store, that's what I'll do. Then they will see. I will=

Oblina: You cannot be serious. Bring the whole class back to Crazy Jed's? Why, that's crazy!

Ickis: Crazy maybe. I'll find a TV then. I will find it and I will bring it back here.

Krumm: But Ickis, you heard the Gromble. TV is more dangerous than soap.

Oblina: What if you turn into a potato?

Krumm: Yeah, what would we tell your parents.

Ickis: There has got to be a television in here someplace. Humans always throwing the good stuff. A-ha! This one's too small anyway. I gonna find the big one like in a store. Let me see...

Krumm: Hi.

Ickis: That's all you have to say? Hi?

Krumm: How are you?

Ickis: What do you think? I couldn't find one that was big enough, so I decided to build one.

Krumm: A television?

Oblina: Ickis, dear, you are obsessing. Let it go. (Ickis drops his screwdriver.) NO! NO! The television! Forget about it!

Ickis: Where are you going?

Oblina: Well, I certainly do not want to be here when the Gromble finds out what you are up to.

Ickis: Don't worry about me.

Oblina: Who said I'm worry about you?

Ickis: You're leaving too?

Krumm: No offense, pal. But she got a point.


Ickis: [coughing] I was this close.

Zimbo: Mr. Ickis, the Snorch would like to know when you will have it, this television?

Monster: What if the Gromble's right? We all turn into potatoes.

Zimbo: Snorch is afraid of nothing. Look, he's choosing the color yellow. He likes the color yellow.

Ickis: Alright. Where's Kilowog?

Kilowog: I've got a bad feeling about this.

Ickis: Yes. I told you. What'd I tell you?

Zimbo: Indeed. it is as beautiful as an unborn larvae is a foot.

Ickis: Wait, wait. This isn't TV.

Oblina: But at least someone still has a brain.

Zimbo: He says the overall harmony of the disparate parts was in all probability due to the pervasive use of yellow wire. Oh, but yellow's very nice, beautiful. Personally, I like purple. Oh, but yellow's very nice, beautiful.

Ickis: Look, this isn't TV. It doesn't have dancing or any of the other stuff.

Krumm: So?

Ickis: So! I am going back to Crazy Jed's to figure out what's wrong and you are coming with me, mister.

Krumm: Well, when you put it like that, how can I say no? It's not a very good picture.

Ickis: It's not turned on.

Krumm: I like yours better.

Ickis: Maybe's it's the wires. No, no. Mines fot lots of wires.

Krumm: Looks tasty.

Ickis: Hey. That's it! I don't have that thing. Satellite dish. Krumm, come on, we got work to do. Don't you ever think of anything else but food?

Krumm: Beverages? This video camera's giving me heartburn. I can still taste the knobs.

[at the garbage where Ickis is searching for satellite dish.]

Ickis: This looks pretty good. Yes!

Ickis: Its perfect.


Monster: Oh no, Gabby's gone!

Monster: Thelma is gone too!

Zimbo: Poor thing, such a short and sweet life.

Oblina: You named them?

Zimbo: But of course. How else could we tell them apart? [To Snorch] Look, Snorch! Thelma's back! Oh, quel joy!

Oblina: It happened so quickly. Look, their brains have turned to skankem.

Ickis: Okay, this time I got it.

Zimbo: Thelma, Gabby, Arlo You have destroyed them all, and for what?

Leaky: Hey, I want my TV!

Ickis: I don't understand where's the singing and dancing? What's he saying?

Zimbo: He says you will bring back Thelma or he'll make you potato.


Ickis: Come on, bugs! Let's rage!

[All the monsters (except Oblina) are dancing while watching the TV, until the Gromble come to them.]

Gromble: And too, Snorch, eh?

Zimbo: We heard about this device and came to disarm it when-

Gromble: ENOUGH! So, you couldn't leave well enough alone, could you? You had to experience this for yourselves.

[Krumm Hiccups. The Gromble turns to Ickis.]

Gromble: Ickis! Don't you realize it took one single day to turn your classmates into, BRAINLESS FOOLS!?

[Krumm Hiccups again.]

Ickis: Um, I wouldn't go so far as to say fools, sir. Dimwits, maybe.

Gromble: Well, I won't tolerate it anymore! o you hear me? I won't have it. It's disruptive, it's corrosive and it's, it's... it's me. Now that's entertainment.

[Gromble could see himself on TV.]

Ickis: Maybe this isn't such a good idea.